Don't Give Up

"Because of you, I didn't give up." -Chanda Kaushik

I carry stories around with me everywhere I go.  Each day I remember the pain of someone I've met recently and I spend a few minutes thinking about their situation.  I remember the courage of those around me and allow that to inspire me.  I think about these people and often times try to let them know that I was thinking about them because sometimes being thought of is all we need.  I know a lot of people who are in far worse situations than I have ever been in...many of them, far worse than I will ever be in.  When I think of all of the pain I've ever felt and compare my pain to what these individuals must be feeling, it hurts the deepest parts of me.  All I know to say to these people is don't give up.

Everyone should have something that drives them.  When they don't want to live, this is the thing that makes them fight for their lives anyway.  For me, it's my family.  My wife, my moms, and my dogs.  Everyone should also have a tool.  Something that undoubtedly will restore their faith in life and their willingness to live.  There are a few things that have done that for me.  First is water.  Being near natural, moving water always calms my soul.  The energy makes me smile.  I think of all that's been put on this earth for me to enjoy when I'm near waterfalls.  I see the beauty that lies within life.  I see the simplicity of washing away what we don't want and restoring it with something we do.  When I'm feeling low, Jordan always takes me hiking to some sort of waterfall or river and I feel refreshed and renewed.  Second, for me, is pampering.  I like to take a hot bath with candles and a glass of wine.  Or unwind with a pedicure and my favorite treat (which changes every week, by the way).  Finally, there are videos and books that just remind me of what my purpose in life is.  I like to revisit these things to "recharge my battery."  Get Out of That Pit by Beth Moore is one I always find myself going back to.  And anything that Angela Thomas has ever said or written touches me so deeply.  Do You Think I'm Beautiful and When Wallflowers Dance are two books that I will never get tired of.  And Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge is one of the most beautiful books I've ever read.  These are just a few of my favorites (I've linked the amazon pages where you can these books out, if you're interested).  At times, these were the reasons I didn't give up.

My final, and most often used tool, is support.  I extend my heart and worries to others.  I allow them to share in my pain and I try not to bear it all alone.  As a woman, this is hard.  We want to have it all together.  We want to show the world that we can handle any and everything.  It's not true.  And while all of us are trying to prove the same thing to each other, just know, we really aren't fooling one another.  When my emotions start running wild, instead of concealing them and trying to put on a pretty face for the world, I just let my friends and family know.  "Hey, I'm having a hard time right now.  I need you to love me.  I need to feel you right now.  I need prayers and hugs and laughs."  Surprisingly enough, I've never had a negative response to that request.  My support is where I find my bearings.  For me, the other tools wouldn't be of much use if I didn't have people constantly reminding me of their love and commitment to me and my well being.

When hurt, confusion, and belittlement creep through the back door, you have to be prepared to fight them.  But we don't have to fight them alone.  We can't come crashing to our knees every time heartache says hello...that's why our tools are so useful.  Preparing yourself ahead of time, knowing how to handle your crisis situation, that's what gives us time to breathe in the midst of all of the mess that goes on in our lives.  And having someone to hold your hand along the way, that's what reminds you to utilize the tools that you've set aside.  Regardless of where you are now, where you once were, or where you think you're going, find your tools.  Find your reason.  Find your support. And don't you ever give up!

"You were never meant to go through life by the skin of your teeth, but to flourish in the love and acceptance of almighty God." -Beth Moore